Black Belt Mama

So Now You'll Know

The other day, I noticed I was getting a decent amount of traffic from Citizen of the Month.  I went to investigate (always worried people are saying mean things about me) to find out that he's a writer in LA and I just so happen to be a "current crush."  I don't need to tell you that he made my day. 

He had this fun post up about not winning blogging awards and feeling left out, and set out to change all of that with this interviewing idea.  Hoards of people commented and suddenly the Citizen of the Month had a part time job of assigning interviewers with interviewees.  To be honest, I sort of forgot about it until I got a nice email from Dave. 

Dave didn't know my blog even existed before coming here to research and think up some interesting questions.  His questions are as follows, and if you've been reading me for a while, I think you'll find you'll be getting some new information:

1. A quick perusal of your posts and background reveal your family life, adventures and challenges in martial arts, freelance and personal writing are the among many things that form the basis of your
enviable and rich life.  Do you ever feel insecure (like many men) that your professional pursuits haven't landed you a more conventional brand of success (like a CEO)?

What?  You mean I'm not the CEO???  I actually consider myself to be the Supreme Ruler of Black Belt Mama which is way better than CEO, but anyway. . . in all seriousness, I used to answer the question "What do you want to be when you grow up?" with one word: rich.  I'm not rich when it comes to money; but I am rich in other areas.  I have two perfect little girls (Yes, I'm extremely biased and I'm also correct).  I have a husband who loves me and this family, so much so that he's made sacrifices for all of us by working twice as hard as many others so that I don't have to work outside the home.  We made a ton of sacrifices to get where we are, selling our home to move in with my parents for a year when I had my first baby and my husband needed to switch career paths so that we'd be able to begin again on only one income. 

So no, I don't feel insecure.  Do I sometimes wish I had a bigger house, or that I was able to take more lavish vacations and buy whatever I want to buy?  Absolutely. Who doesn't wish that from time to time?  I've been very fortunate though, that I've been able to stay home with my girls, write for fun (and sometimes for some money), work from home with jobs that allow me the freedom to be a SAHM and also have some adult interaction, and do something that I love. . . write. I think I have a fairly enviable life and I'm pretty proud of it, CEO or not. 

2. You're a great writer (in my amateur opinion).  Are you obsessed over your site's traffic and do you make a significant amount of cash from your blog?

I hate to admit this, but some days I check my site traffic before I get my kids breakfast.  Obsessed doesn't even begin to describe it.  Sometimes I think I have a serious problem.  I get super happy when someone new links to me or mentions me (as long as they're not all like "I hate that BBM.  She's a . . . ".  Then it's not so great).  But yes, totally obsessed.  As far as the money issue goes, that depends on what you mean by significant?  Could I buy a bunch of bananas with my blog revenue?  Totally (Pretty cool, right?).  Could I buy a new dress?  Possibly, depending on the month and the designer.  So "significant"?  Not exactly, but I guess it all depends on what your definition of significant happens to be.   

3. You never use your name in any post I could find but you freely publish your picture.  Why the partial anonymity?

I guess I think of it this way.  I only publish pictures of me on my site that I think are exceptionally good pictures of me.  Do I look this way in real life on a regular basis?  Puh-lease!  Don't make me laugh.  So, I guess I figure no one will really recognize me.  I don't use my name on my site because I didn't want former students googling me, getting together at reunions and saying things like "Did you see that Ms. B on the internet?  Omigod, she's like a blogger, y'all."  I taught English people.  While I try to adhere as much as possible to the standards I gave my students, it just doesn't happen all the time. 

Also, crazy stalker serial killer people.  You know, general reasons.

4. You don't swear, even at the drive through of McD's when confronted with a bitchy worker.   Do your parents read your blog or are you just that virtuous?

Do my parents read my blog?  My parents have no understanding of my blog.  I mean, they've been on it every once in a while if I've told them to go read something specifically.  Maybe. When I tell them something cool about my blog like "I'm getting published" or "I got a paycheck from my blog" they sort of nod and look at each other in confusion.  Truth be told, they probably have that "I can't believe we paid X amount for college when all she's going to do is change diapers and 'blog'" conversation when I'm not around. You'll need to keep in mind that pretty much every time my Mom wants to check her email, she calls me and asks me what she's doing wrong when she can't get on, and usually, she doesn't have the computer on yet.  Ok, it's not that bad, but you get the idea. 

Virtuous?  No.  I take full responsibility for Lil C saying s%&t the other day and when she gets mad, she sometimes says "damn it" because I do too.  I also swear into a pillow at physical therapy when my PT is pushing my knee too far.  I'm horrible when I'm mad too.  Saying it is one thing though.  Putting it down in writing?  The big time swearing stuff?  I don't know.  I guess my opinion on that is sort of like my Grandmother's opinion on girls who drink out of beer bottles (which I do, but she doesn't have to know about it).  If you want to do so, that's fine.  I'll probably laugh and enjoy it.  It's just not me, not here anyway.
 
5.  I apologize for not being able to read your entire site, but is there a post where you've described using your martial arts skills to defend yourself?

No, actually there is not.  I haven't had the need to defend myself since I started taking karate.  That doesn't mean I didn't need to before I started taking karate.  I didn't write about it here before, but I was on a date that went very wrong a long time ago.  With no karate training what-so-ever, I beat the guy to a pulp.  He deserved every kick, every punch and every elbow I threw at him that day.  I got away completely unscathed; he wasn't so lucky.  Many people wonder whether or not they'll be able to defend themselves when faced with a scary situation.  I know I can. 

I train because I wanted to learn karate and be better able to defend myself.  I also truly believe that when you know your stuff, you carry yourself differently.  People just know not to mess with you, sort of like the Jedi mind tricks.  (Oh MY GOD!  Did I just say that?  Mr. BBM is getting to me.  He's seriously getting to me!)

6. I enjoyed one of your first posts, Butt Flinging "Ash Holes".  A hilarious tale, in retrospect only, that
makes a parent a parent.  I noticed your style and tone haven't changed much compared to your more recent posts.  Do you think your writing (style or content) has changed over the past couple years?

My style hasn't changed much at all.  At least I don't think it has.  I spent so many years writing that I think my style is what it is at this point.  I refined it in college and it seems to remain steady.  As far as content goes, things have changed around here a lot.  The focus of this blog was always getting to shodan and beyond; but with this acl injury, surgery and rehab, the focus has really changed.  It's not so much about getting to the black belt test anymore.  It's more about learning how to walk again the right way and getting stronger.  Overall, I think that the tone has changed and will continue to do so.  This injury is forcing me to think about things and look at things in very different ways.  I'm not quite sure where it's all going yet, but hopefully you'll all stick around for the ride.

7. We all love Neil, but after Citizen of the Month (and Dooce), what is your current favorite site on the web (doesn't have to be a blog)?

I absolutely adore Karl of Secondhand Tryptophan.  I "rented" a spot on his blog many months ago, which led to a coveted spot on his blog roll, a guest post, a video that no one can seem to forget, and a nice friendship as well.  He just cracks me up.  He has the ability to take the tiniest detail and make it so hilariously funny.

I'm a bit ashamed to admit it, but I also love MySpace.  I know, I know, but when you can search by graduation year and lurk back on all your former students and see how they turned out, and confirm that you were completely right about so-and-so. . . it's a guilty pleasure. What can I say?  No one is perfect.

Thanks to Citizen of the Month for setting this up, and to Dave for coming up with some very thought-provoking questions! 

***Don't forget to enter the contest give-away over at The BBM Review.  Check out the "My Fruit Roll-Ups" post and leave your comment before it's too late.  Make sure you check back often.  We have some cool martial-arts related give-aways coming up in February!

New Tagline in Order?

I don't know how it happened, but somehow a picture of me got submitted to a website called www.imageoak.com under the category of "karate women."  My traffic has exploded in recent days because of it.  I went to the site and was trying to figure out what exactly it is and how and why I'm on there.  Apparently, someone has to submit a web page/picture for inclusion on the site.  It's an image directory so to speak. 

So, what I want to know is, who submitted my picture to the site?  I've been getting hits from all over the world from this site and I'd really like to know who to thank for all the additional traffic.  So, I'm calling you out.  Who are you? 

I'd also like to mention here that I am the number # 1 site for the following searches on Google:

"i suck at sparring"

"black mama sex"

"sexy female black belt"

So, with that in mind, I'd like to thank all those lonely guys in Ireland, England, Spain, Italy, Indonesia and other countries throughout the world for such wonderful search engine optimization help.  It makes me proud.  I think I'm going to add a tag line to my blog that goes something like this:

"Black Belt Mama: Disappointing Men Looking for 'Black Mama Sex' since 2006". 

Searches III OR People are Strange

Stat counters are wonderful things.  You can watch your visitor statistics rise (or plummet).  You can see who is reading you and who is not.  You can find out that you have one person in Iceland who must be obsessed with your blog, and you can also find out what search terms are landing people on your site.  I've posted these results twice before, here and here.  If you haven't checked these out before, you really should. They're usually pretty funny, and the following search terms do not disappoint. . . As before, I've provided some "theme" music for your listening pleasure.  Just hit "play."

(If I had to "rate" the rest of this post as they do for the movies, I would rate it an R-Restricted.  Proceed with caution if you have children who can read around you.)

Blogalicious

There are apparently awards for bloggers.  Who knew?  Anyway, if you want to make some nominations, like I did for all my favorites, you can go here.  Nominations are accepted until 1/10 and voting takes place on 1/22.  Where's the category for favorite martial arts blog anyway?

And speaking of "blogalicious". . . (because I have that ridiculous Fergie song stuck in my head for all eternity), if you are a reader and commenter here and I haven't added you to my blogroll, please let me know.  Updating my blogroll is a royal pain in the derriere because of the way I have it formatted but I realize it may be time for some additions/edits.  And, if you've emailed me in the last month and asked for a link, it's been a crazy month.  I'll get back to you soon!

Remembering Ronald Tartaro

I remember everything about September 11, 2001.  Our baby was just five months old and we were visiting relatives in western Pennsylvania, not far from the site of the plane crash in Shanksville, PA.  When we turned the TV on and saw the horror of what was going on; I remember thinking that my life would never be the same.  I remember crying and wondering how we would even get home. At least we were all able to go home.  I remember the ticker going across the screen on CNN that began listing more and more names of those who had perished.  It was so sad.  I remember recognizing one of the names as someone I had gone to college with; but most of the names were just that. . . names.  So many names. 

Ronald Tartaro was one of those names and would not ever see home again.  Ronald was 39 years old, an Executive VP for Fred Alger Management, which was located on the 93rd floor of the World Trade Center North Tower.  Ronald Tartaro and his wife, Karen met at a party where she beat him at Trivial Pursuit.  They were married in 1993.  Karen had worked at Fred Alger Management and helped Ronald to get a job there as well.  She left shortly after they were married to raise their family.  They had three children together: two daughters and a son.  Karen describes her husband as being "the most honest person she knows."  She also said that he was "logical" and "reasonable" and that "he always did the thing that made the most sense." 

Ronald was a first generation American, born of Croatian immigrants, and was the "star of the family."  His family says that from a young age he was already making plans for his future.  He had big plans for himself and from a young age was a happy person and sweet to others. 

He loved the water and spent time as a child fishing and learning how to sail.  He graduated from Columbia University with a B.A. in 1983 and followed it a year later with an M.S.  He was an immediate success in the financial district and continued to move up through the years.  He was in the process of building a larger house on several acres in NJ for him and his family. 

One of the family's great loves was getting outdoors and cycling.  Ronald and Karen started off riding a tandem bicycle together and from what I've read about them, were as in sync on the bicycle as they were in their marriage.  With the addition of their girls, they added a bike trailer; and when their son arrived, he took over the trailer and their eldest daughter rode a bicycle attached to her Mommy's. 

Ronald Tartaro's other great love was sailing and his dream was to buy a sail boat and sail around the world.  He wanted his family and friends to accompany him on different legs of the trip.  His wife says that he almost had his sailboat funded. 

I'd like to think of Ronald Tartaro as having that sailboat he wanted so much in life.  I'm going to think of him as sailing above us all, watching over his wife, his daughters, his son, his sister, and his parents, patiently waiting until he can finally take them on a trip around the heavens. 

Special thanks to The New York Times, CNN, The Columbia Spectator, and Newsweek who were all great sources of information about Ronald Tartaro.  To read the other tributes that are part of the 2996, go here. 

Perfect Post-August

It was easy for me to pick a Perfect Post this month.  With all of the emotions involved with sending my first baby off to Kindergarten, I couldn't help but be moved by Karl's post about meeting his twin daughters for the very first time.  It took me back to the baby days with Big I which is exactly where I wish I could be right about now. 

Dropping Big I off at Kindergarten was gut wrenching, and I can only imagine what it must be like having not been able to see your daughters for the first few weeks of their lives and what that first meeting must have felt like for Karl.  If you haven't already read it, please check out his post. 

If you'd like to see other Perfect Post Winners for the month of August, you can see them here or here. 

A Mom who SHOULD feel guilty and more. . .

I am not the best parent in the world.  I don't always keep my cool.  As far as I'm concerned, anyone who says they are always a picture perfect parent who never starts to lose it, is a big fat liar.  However, there are some people who never should have had children. 

I play tennis during the summer with a group of women.  We play doubles for a couple hours every week and have a lot of fun.  Tonight we were playing and while I was about to receive a serve, I heard crying.  Loud crying.  Hysterical crying.  I glanced in the direction it was coming from and saw a little boy who was definitely no more than two years of age (and that's being generous).  He was a really little guy and was toddling along with the uncertainty of a newish walker, and was screaming hysterically with his little arms in the air.  I finished playing the point thinking that I must be wrong; a parent must be nearby.  The point ended and I instinctively starting walking towards the little boy.  He was three tennis courts away from me, just outside of the fence standing in a grassy area right by the parking lot. . . Right beside the parking lot where teenagers regularly go driving about 50 mph, radio blaring as they pass by the courts.  I yelled to the other women I was playing with, "Have any of you seen a parent with that little boy?"  They all shook their heads, "No." 

I started running.  I crossed behind the men who were playing beside us and ran behind the men who were playing beside them.  I was about at the gate.  The little toddler was still screaming hysterically.  He was still a baby.  As I got closer I realized he couldn't yet be two.  Just as I was about to reach the gate and make the final run to the distressed child, a woman in a mini-van, at LEAST six cars away from where the little boy was standing BY HIMSELF, just TWO FEET from the crowded parking lot, emerges from the van and screams at this child, "I TOLD YOU TO COME HERE!" 

She had apparently seen me running to the child's aid and sprinted her fat ass out of the van quickly enough to beat me to him.  All of the tennis had stopped on the courts.  Everyone was watching.  She quickly put him in the van and drove away.  I highly doubt he was properly restrained in a car seat. 

When I wrote a while back about having an urge to use my karate to teach some teenage boys a lesson after almost killing me and Lil C by driving too fast around a dangerous curve, I received warnings and words of caution.  I may get them now, but I seriously wanted to POUND this woman. If she hadn't driven away as fast as she did in her dark minivan, I would have definitely had some strong words for her.  She better seriously hope she does not see me again.

The thing is this: every mother (and father) has a day like that.  Every mother has one of those days where you just feel ready to crack.  Every mother has been in a situation where "it's time to go" and your little one has a completely different idea.  Every mother is going to have a day when their child is having an absolute tantrum and you just can't deal anymore. 

The difference between a good mother and a bad one is that good ones know how to deal with this situation.  If your child is still in a crib, you place the child calmly in the crib with a few of his/her favorite toys and walk away and collect yourself.  If your child is older, you send them to their room, where they are safe and you will have a moment or two to yourself.  Who among mothers hasn't been there?  We all have and if you say that you haven't, I'll say it again: you are a big far liar, or your child isn't old enough to really test you yet, or you don't spend enough time with your kids.  It happens to the best of us. 

Bad mothers, like the one tonight, have days like this and deal with them in a ridiculous way that could potentially cause harm to their child.  I get it that the child did not want to leave the park; but when your child is this small, you pick him/her up and put them in their car seat, kicking and screaming, whatever.  If you have to carry them on your side, head out the front, feet out the back, you do so.  You DO NOT leave your child unattended near a busy, crowded PARKING LOT of all places.  I get the whole, "I'm leaving. . . " thing.  I would be lying if I said I never did this.  Would I EVER do this in a parking lot?  NO WAY!  It works in the Disney Store; it works at amusement parks, but I would NEVER do this in a parking lot and I would NEVER let myself be as far away as that woman was from her son.  I would NEVER try this technique with a child as young as that little boy. 

He was not even old enough to understand what she was doing.  There is no way he could have possibly comprehended that he was supposed to follow.  He probably didn't even see her, because she was THAT. FAR. AWAY. 

The worst part of this whole night is knowing that little boy went home with THAT woman. I can only hope that she got herself together by the time they arrived home.

I often feel like I could be a better Mom.  I think that I should take my kids to the park more, or to the pool more, or come up with new things to do more frequently.  Every Mom has "Mom Guilt" and it's usually there unnecessarily. 

If that mother has "Mom Guilt" she deserves it 100%.  She should be ashamed of herself.   

I just had to get that off my chest. 

(Deep exhale)

And on to happier things. . .

Yep, you saw it here.  I'm just getting all famous and stuff.  Now I'm being "interviewed".  I'm special, what can I say.  I wish that button said, "Hey Girls and Guys" because I know I have a LOT of male readers; and I love all my readers dearly regardless of what type of equipment you have.  But, if you just can't get enough of me today, you can click on that happy looking chick and check out my interview.  After you check out the interview for Black Belt Mama, you can also read the interview from Birth Stories, which has also been listed on the site.  That interview can be found here. 

And speaking of not being able to get enough of me. . . my black octagonal sai are IN!  They have finally arrived, which means a video of yours truly trying to do justice to Kyan No Sai may be just around the corner.  I said "MAY BE."  I feel like I should let all my fellow karate-ka's know I'm legit; but at the same time, I would much rather make you laugh and get enjoyment from my words, my writing.  Posting a video that can be picked apart by all (and potentially laughed at), especially since I've been "found out" is a little intimidating.  So, I will post a video of Kyan No Sai under these conditions:

• After video is shot, if wrinkles are highly visible-the video is getting tossed.
• If I'm having a bad hair day-the video is getting tossed. 
• If I start talking to myself during the kata-the video is getting tossed.
• If my husband starts laughing while filming the kata-the video is getting tossed.

Can you deal with these conditions?  Can you follow your mother's advice if I post a video and "If you don't have something nice to say, keep it to yourself"?  You think about it, and I will too. . . maybe. . .

You know what else has arrived?  Yep, that's right. . .

Lil C's baby gi is here, which means that a new picture is forth-coming.  I think I might wait until after testing though, in September.  Maybe Big I will have another green stripe, and I just might be flaunting the fall's must have color and accessory for any karate-ka. . . brown belt.

New Gig and Exciting News

I wrote a post recently about Mommy Bloggers.  I never published it.  The basic idea of it was that I don't know what kind of blogger I am.  I'm a Mom and I blog, so do people consider me a Mommy Blogger?  Or, do they consider me something else entirely?  The post was about me not being really sure where I fit into the whole blogging categorizing stereotyping thing.  (I had the same dilemma in high school when I was a cheerleader/field hockey player/saxophonist in the jazz band/student council member/writer for school paper/ping pong club member/prom committee.  Yes, I said ping pong club.  That's a whole other post.)

If I'm a "Karate Blogger". . . GREAT!  Happy to be a member of the club.  If I'm a "Mommy Blogger". . . Cool!  A lot of my favorite reads are Mommy Bloggers and I'd joyfully accept my membership in that club as well.  I take it personally when I hear about Mommy Blogger bashing.  After all, it is a free country, and individuals have a choice of what to read and what not to.  Why don't the bashers just decide NOT to read the Mommy Bloggers instead of making a big deal out of such a silly issue?  It seems like a waste of time to me.   

While lots of "Mommy bloggers" are getting gigs out there writing about parenting and kids, etc., I'm getting different kinds of offers entirely.  I already told you about my hometown newspaper blog.  They asked me to write about karate, and I only post my karate posts there because I don't want people knowing too much of my business around town.  I also like a certain degree of anonymity, especially when my children are involved.  (Of course, we've all learned this week that anonymity can be blown out the door without warning.) 

Then came an email from an unlikely source. . . Last week I was asked to write some exclusive posts for a website called "Save the Soldiers".  Their website is in existence entirely to support the troops wherever they are, whatever they may be doing.  They were looking to expand their "Off Topic" area and asked me to write for them.

It occurred to me that I must not be a "Mommy Blogger" if "Save the Soldiers" is asking me to write for them.

I thought it was a very worthy cause.  I already know of a couple soldiers who like my site, so I thought why not?  If you'd like to read my latest post over there, you can view it here.  I'll be posting an exclusive there once a week. 

When you come back from there, give my renter a hello, and help her pick a baby name already!  Her time here will end this weekend and you don't want to miss how she goes through the names and hashes each one out. 

And speaking of babies. . . I told you a few weeks ago about little Julia.  You can visit her site under my "If I'm not here, I'm there" roll call.  After enduring a few weeks now of chemotherapy and nasty side effects, losing her hair, and being in the hospital more than at home. . . they did a scan of her brain to check on whether or not the chemo is doing its job on her brain tumor. 

I am overjoyed to report that her tumor is at least half the size it was previously.  It's amazing how you can care so much about someone you've never even met.  I cried tears of joy this morning and just had to share the news.  If you've said a prayer for her, thank you and KEEP IT UP! 

Also, Deryck's daughter, Percy recently had open heart surgery.  He has a great site and a heart-warming story, not to mention the adorable pictures. 

Also, the latest birth story is up.  I truly never realized how many women still had natural childbirth.  I thought I was alone in that (I know I was the lone screamer at the hospital both nights that I gave birth).  I am actively looking for submissions, so if you are interested please see the guidelines over on the site, and shoot me an email when you have your submission ready! 

"Because they still haven't found what they're looking for. . . "

It was right around the 4th of July when I published the first edition of the searches that have landed readers on my site.  It's now the 4th of August and let me tell you, there have been some good ones. I picked the best of the last month.  Before digging into the list, you may want to scroll down and hit play.  I've kindly provided theme music.

1. kicked leg tae kwon do ice or heat- The answer is. . . .IBUPROFEN and then ICE, ICE, ICE.  When I hurt my back a few years ago, my chiropractor recommended ice for the first week.  When I had a visit from the Rice Crispie boys a few weeks ago, it was all about the ice as well. 
   
2. what happens when knee pops-Several moments after the kicked leg search, this search landed on my site.  I can help the person who did this search.  The answer to what happens is simple and can be summed up in one word. . . PAIN.  See the first search for advice on how to deal with the pain.
3. learn karate free online videos-Yeah, good luck with that.  I've said it before and I'll say it again.  You can NOT learn karate online.  If you already have a basic understanding of it, you can look to the internet for videos that can supplement your learning.  However, nothing replaces the importance of training in a dojo, with real live people.  I highly doubt you'll ever be fighting air. 
   
4. is puke biodegradable-Yes, it is.  Wish I would have thought of that at the beach. 
5. my boyfriend does not want to propose-I constantly get searches from queries like this.  Nothing you read on the internet is going to make your boyfriend propose.  If you want to get married and he doesn't and he's not indicating that he has any plans to spend the future with you, get out now before you waste any more of your time.
6. why men can't look woman in the eye- There are three possible reasons.  1. He's looking at your chest.  2.  He's lying.  3.  He's too shy to.  If the answer is 1 or 2, feel free to kick him in the shin.
7. i am pregnant and I think i have food poisoning-Oh My!  I feel so sorry for you.  Pregnancy can be puke inducing all on its own, but add food poisoning and you've got a nightmare in the making.  Seek medical help immediately.  Please.  Trust me.  And if you don't believe this little snippet of advice, read this. 
8. black mama AND beach ball sized belly- How did this search land on my site, and why in the hell is someone looking for these criteria?  Oh yeah, I forgot. . . because beach-ball sized bellies are sooooo hot.  It's all the rage right now.  You only need take a stroll around the mall to see a beach-ball like belly sticking out the top of some seriously too low jeans, on someone who should probably still be playing with Barbie dolls or Little People.  Sad and wrong, just like that search.
   
9. little black biting fly 3 body segments swimming pool-Run for cover!  No really, those bites are horrendous.  Make it an indoor movie day.
10. my registration expired and my sticker is fake- O.k. that's not good.  My sticker wasn't fake and I still had to pay an arm and a leg. 
    
11. pictures of elderly doing martial arts- The fact that this search landed on my site is enough to make me want to curl up in the fetal position and sleep for a long long time. . .

While I'm sleeping off my sadness, go see my renter who is about to experience the first time in a long time that she's been without parental responsibilities. 

Perfect Post-July

When I asked to be one of the presenters, I had no idea how hard it would be to choose a "perfect post."  I can be a picky person.  But when I found this post, at "Welcome to My Closet, Here's a Black Dress", I knew I had found it.  She writes about change and more specifically her fear of change.  She writes so well.  Here's just one example: "I watched my body change as he grew inside of me and now I watch the shape of my days change as he grows outside of me."  This post was just so honest, and provided so much food for thought that I couldn't not give it a Perfect Post award. 

Go check it out.  If you'd like to read other Perfect Post's for the month of July you can visit Suburban Turmoil or Petroville.  (You can also just click on the perfect post award button.)
 

In other news, there's a new birth story posted, so please check it out.  I am looking for new submissions as well, so spread the word and get writing. 

Also, if you haven't already done so, please go visit my renter.  Click on the thumbnail in the side bar and you'll be taken to visit Ramblings of a Not-So Typical Stay at Home Mom.  She won't be there for much longer and you don't want to miss her!