Black Belt Mama

Tagged-Weird things

I have been tagged by Sesame for the six weird things meme.  I did this last year around this time, but because I am relatively certain there are more than six weird things about me, I'll play. 

1.  I have an uncanny ability for screwing up song lyrics to almost any song.  It provides my husband with great amusement.  For example, if you're familiar with the song "Take my Breath Away" circa the Top Gun era, you probably know that towards the end of that song, the singer says, "Looking through the glass I saw you. . . ".  Well, for years I belted along with her, but my version was, "Julio Iglesius saw you. . . "  According to Mr. BBM, I've also screwed up many other songs.  But most of the time, I prefer the lyrics my way. 

2.  Poor eating habits of other people can make me physically sick.  Some of my major pet peeves are people who chew with their mouth open, double-dippers, finger lickers, and oh man, I think I need to go be sick.  I can't even think about nasty table manners without feeling nauseous.  Gross.

3.  If I seem kind of in a zone, it's probably because I'm doing mental karate, mostly kata.  I imagine myself doing kata's while driving, while drifting off to sleep, during commercial breaks, when I'm cooking and even when I'm in the shower.

4.  I form strange attachments to inanimate objects.  For example, I will not allow my Mom to get rid of many of my toys/stuffed animals, etc. from childhood.  I feel bad for the toys/stuffed animals.  I blame my parents for raising me with empathy.  Apparently it went too far.  I also have a problem getting rid of clothing that is either out of date or no longer my size, especially when said item of clothing has sentimental value attached to it.  For example, if I wore that blue shirt on our 26th date or something equally ludicrous.  I thought adulthood would bring more rational thought on this issue, but now I just blame the Toy Story movies for putting on the big screen what I've imagined all along:  toys do have feelings.

5.  I have taken karate for several years now.  I insisted on having a high tech security system installed in our home.  I am always on alert when I am outside of the house and am a stickler for safety. Having said that. . . I can't even begin to tell you how many times I have left my keys hanging in the front door of my house for anyone to just waltz right on in.  Once I even did so overnight, when my husband was traveling. It took me a good 45 minutes to find those keys, because there was "no way I could have left them in the door-not me!  NEVER!" and there they were.

6.  I have every piece of baby clothes, baby towels, baby toys, baby equipment that we have ever received as a gift or bought ourselves.  I can not even fathom the idea of getting rid of any of it.  Most Mom's willingly hand out outgrown clothing to other Mom's with little ones, but I CAN NOT bring myself to do this.  Every piece of clothing is attached to some type of baby memory, and I don't want to lose that physical reminder.  It's just such an amazing time that I can't part with any of it.  (I guess this one goes with #4 but my crawl space full of baby things says this one deserved a number all its own.) 

So, who to tag?  Who to tag?  I'm going to go with: Papa Bradstein, Forging Ironman, One Crazy Chick, thatblackbeltchic, and Junebee.  If you're not tagged and would like to play along, go for it and let me know you did.  I tried to pick bloggers I haven't tagged before, so play if you'd like to or feel free to just ignore me; everyone else does.

Did I guilt you into playing?  Good.

"I'm too big"

Dear Big I,

Today, at 1:29 a.m., you will turn six years old.  This is not news to you because you've been counting down the days since about December.  Tonight at the grocery store, instead of climbing into the truck shopping cart with your sister, you stood back and watched her climb in before saying, "I'm too big to get in there."  Daddy said he felt his heart break a little bit, and I'd be lying if I didn't say that mine did as well.  This is nothing new for either of us because each year of watching you turn a new number has brought excitement mixed with a bit of sadness.  You're growing up so fast.

This has been such a year of changes for us.  You went from being a stay-at-home kid to being a Kindergarten girl.  It wasn't a transition that was easy for either of us; but you weathered it like a pro and have made Daddy and I so proud.  You've learned many things over the past year: how to tie your shoes by yourself, how to sound out words, and count to 100.  You've also learned that sometimes kids can be mean.  But along with that, you've learned to let things roll off your shoulders and to stick up for yourself when necessary.  That was a lesson I was hoping you would wait a few more years to have to learn. 

I've watched you grow from a little girl into a big girl this year and saw your independence like never before.  I've also seen the struggle you've gone through between wanting to remain a baby versus growing up.  I don't blame you on the days you'd rather stay little.

Today was a beautiful day and we spent much of the day outside playing together, you, me and Lil C.  It was an ordinary day except that I kept thinking about the fact that on this day six years ago, I was in labor anxiously awaiting your arrival.  Six years later, you stand tall enough to be on a collision course with my elbows on a daily basis, but I am still your number one playmate.  I don't know how many more years that will be the case.  So, today will be one of the many days that I lock away in my memory for safe keeping.   

When I think about the fact that Kindergarten is quickly coming to an end, and that you'll be leaving me to go to school all day next year, I could just sob.  There are some days that I just can't wait until you get home from school.  But I'm going to try not to get ahead of myself and instead think about the whole summer we have to spend together.

You are a beautiful young lady, inside and out.  I can't wait to see what "6" brings.  Happy Birthday Big I!

I love you,

Mommy

If you'd like to read Big I's birth story, you can do so here. 

When all the black belts gather

The black/brown belt class I've been attending for the past few months usually ends up being private/semi-private lessons for me.  Tonight was a big switch.  There were six black belts in attendance and one very clueless brown belt (that would be yours truly). 

I've been feeling good lately because I am relatively close to knowing all the kata's I need to know up to black belt testing.  Tonight I got to see the great beyond.

In kobudo, there are four weapons needed up to black belt: one nunchaku kata, three bo kata's, two tunfa kata's and two sai kata's.  After that, things get crazy.  There are two-man weapons kata's, and a whole slew of new weapons to learn as well.  Tonight I got a taste of some of the other weapons that I had only seen hanging on the wall before. 

We worked on eiku and nunte bo kata's tonight and although extremely confusing, it's always fun to try something new.  Eiku is like swinging around a large oar.  It is heavy and awkward for someone who has no clue how to use the thing.  For someone who bought a youth bo so that I would have something nice and light, this was a big switch for me.  The neat thing about using these weapons is that you can see the history to the weapon, and easily know what its everyday use was and how it could be converted into a weapon if necessary. 

Even more heavy than the eiku, was the nunte bo.  I believe the intended use for this weapon was as a means to catch fish, Survivor style.  The first time we ran through this kata, I just used my bo.  One of my instructors gave me a nunte bo to give it a try the next time we ran through it and there is a big difference.  The center of the nunte bo is completely different than on a traditional bo, and it is HEAVY.  Forget Pilates; if I want to tone my arms, I'll just need to start swinging around a nunte bo more often. 

I also worked on bunkai a bit before class.  For black belt testing, I'll need to know basic bunkai for all of my kata's.  But I'll need to have a showcase open hand and weapons kata that goes a bit beyond.  I think that I'd really like to do a sai kata for my showcase bunkai.  I've always really like the sai, and I feel comfortable with them which is important. 

Of course, every time I thought I had a good handle on a weapon, I realized that I was in fact wrong. . . very, very wrong.  So, we'll see what happens. 

I'm being too nice

Since Monday I've been working on my first kata, Nai Hanchi Shodan, every chance I get.  I figured that if I'm going to go kata by kata and start fixing things, I might as well incorporate bunkai (application) into my practice as well. 

Mr. BBM has been a great help to me with this and has been a fabulous uke.  He has continued to stay a good sport, even when I demand that he come over and punch towards my face within minutes of him walking in the door from work, so that I can block and throw him around a bit.  He didn't even mind that much when I was experimenting with joint locks and completely wrenched his arm unintentionally while I was deep in thought. 

The problem in working with him though is that when you're first trying to work out the application, it goes very slowly.  Slow kata means that you forget where you are in the kata as you go.  So, I keep having to start from scratch, figure out where I'm at and then continue on.  If he knew the kata he would be of greater assistance to me-yet another reason he needs to get his butt back to the dojo. 

I'd been thinking about the bunkai for this kata all day today and when he walked in the door tonight from work I had to try it out.  Instead of using a double block and back fist as simply a block against a punch, block against another punch, followed by a back fist to the head, I wanted to change it up a bit.  I blocked his first punch, and then pulled the other arm up underneath and around his arm I just blocked, and then back across centerline so as to twist his arm up behind his back.  Basic bunkai is cool enough, but finding a move in there that you didn't know was there is even more exciting. 

When I got to class tonight, I asked my instructor how one would do the back fist after that arm lock without it being awkward.  So, we started off class with a basic bunkai demonstration for the first kata, followed by a not-so-basic demonstration that was really cool. 

The other cool thing is that right as class was beginning, a black belt walked in, which meant he got to play the role of uke (i.e. person who gets thrown around), not me.  Bonus.

When all was said and done and both demonstrations/explanations were finished I came to the conclusion that I am being entirely too nice to Mr. BBM.  Kosa steps are not simply steps; they can be kicking the leg out from underneath someone.   Bringing one's hands back to an on guard position on the belt isn't preparing for the next attacker; it can be breaking an attacker's neck.  I was shocked at how many kills there were in that kata and am now seeing it in a whole new light.   

I think Mr. BBM will be seeing me in a whole new light after I try some of those moves on him too, like possibly the light that he'll be staring up into when he's found himself flat on his back with no warning(rubs hands together and evil laugh ensues).

Everything you wanted to know. . .

You may all be asking what that new thing in the sidebar is over there on the left side.  My friend has a son who has Type 1 Diabetes.  You can visit his website at Kroll Books.  He is participating in a School Walk for Diabetes and is hoping to raise $500 that will go towards research in the fight against Diabetes.  My Mom is a Type 1 Diabetic so his daily struggles hit close to home for us.  We are planning on sponsoring him.  He is a fabulous kid, and if you'd like to donate, click on Chase's name in the sidebar and you'll go directly to his donation web page.  I'd love to see his $500 goal blown out of the water.  If you have an extra $5 laying around, please consider donating to Chase.  If you do, shoot me an email so I can properly shower you with love.

And now, back to business. . .

The questions have been rolling in (or not).  Scott, my new friend, from Forging Ironman asked these questions. 

What is your favorite "karate movie"? Least favorite? And why?

Although it's been a while, my favorite karate movie is probably The Karate Kid.  My least favorite?  I'd have to say that any of the more recent martial arts movies that incorporate all the wires and artistic stuff that looks beautiful, but is in no way realistic.  I remember watching The Karate Kid for days at a time when it was on the channel Prism.  My parents had to turn the TV off and make me go outside.  I loved that movie.  I guess I liked it so much because it showed that hard work pays off and that the good guys can and do win. 

I assume you plan to teach or assist the instructor when you reach black belt. What are you most excited about with teaching? And least?

I would LOVE to teach someday.  Although many probably think that my M.S.Ed. degree is wasted since I'm not in the classroom anymore and wasn't for very long, I have been looking at that degree as a stepping stone to knowing good teaching techniques to one day teach karate.  I am probably most excited about teaching kobudo (weapons).  I am probably least excited about teaching sparring.  I think I’d like to try to teach the Little Dragons some day, just to see what it would be like.  I don’t know if I could take that for long though.

Have you ever competed in a tournament? An out of state tournament? An international tournament? What events did you do?

No, no, and no.  I have absolutely no interest in tournament competing.  I don't think there's anything wrong with entering tournaments; it's just that it's not for me.  I'm not interested in the trophies or the competition.  For me, it's always been much more of a personal thing.  If I were to enter a tournament, I would compete in kata and weapons, but I highly doubt I would compete in sparring.  I've heard horror stories, especially about sparring against woman, and I am not interested at all in that aspect. 

What is your favorite book?

I absolutely loved The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger.  I think it's one of the best books of all time and that it will become a classic.  I also loved Suspect by Michael Robotham; and for a nail-biting, stomach-churning thriller, Intensity by Dean Koonce was a fabulous read. 

What was your favorite subject in school?

It was not math or science, that's for sure!  I'd have to say English.  During my senior year of High School, I took three English classes: 12th grade English, Journalism, and World Literature.  World Literature was an amazing class.  On the first day of class, my teacher slammed a copy of War and Peace on each of our desks and that was what we read until November.

What do you like most about being a mother?

There are so many things I love about being a mother that it's difficult to choose just one thing so I won't.  I love staying at home with my girls and watching them grow and change.  I love all the new little discoveries, like when Lil C says a new word or tries to jump for the first time.  I love seeing the lightbulb turn on when Big I sounds out a new word or ties her shoes for the first time (which happened last week).  I absolutely LOVE when one of my girls curls up on my lap with a book or snuggles up to me when they're sleepy.  I could go on, but you get the idea.

PSU Mommy wants to know: I know you love the city I live in now...what's keeping you from moving back?

The city she's referring to is Pittsburgh.  I lived there for seven years.  Towards the end of our stay in Pittsburgh I had a lot of complaints: the weather, the distance to my family, and I wanted a change.  But since I've moved away, I find myself missing so many things about Pittsburgh: the fact that I could walk around downtown and feel completely safe, Johnny's Place on Craig St.(amazing wings and burgers), the Mexican restaurant Cozumel, the Union Grills’ garlic mashed potatoes. . .  O.k. I admit it; I mostly miss the food. 

What my husband does for a living now isn't a big industry in Pittsburgh.  The job market was not what we wanted it to be when we lived there, and so we moved.  Something tells me he'd have a hard time finding as good of a job out there in his industry.  And, my entire family currently lives in the same county I do, including my soon-to-be 90 year old Grandmother.  As much as I'd like to pack up and go somewhere else sometimes, it's very hard to do that when you know that you have fabulous babysitters surrounding you. 

Thanks to everyone who submitted a question to help get me out of my writer's block!  I have some of the best readers on the planet!

Back to Basics with Whitney

As I was driving home from class tonight, I couldn't help but think of that Whitney Houston song from many years ago.  You know the one, because you've probably had a singing session with it in the shower or car at some point when you were sure no one was listening.  Don't deny it; I know I can't be the only one. 

"I have nothing, nothing, nothing. . . if I don't have you-oooo-oooo." 

You know.  Don't act like you don't.

No, I'm not getting all weepy over my husband or even my karate teachers or school.  Instead of "have," I thought it rather appropriate to replace that word with "know." 

"I know nothing, nothing, nothing. . . . DON'T. MAKE. ME.  DO-ooh one more KATA!  I don't want to find another PROBLEM!  Stay in my COMFORT ZONE-if you dare, or must I just imagine myself there. . . "

In case you're wondering if all my life moments have a mental soundtrack that goes with them. . . yes, most do. 

I asked my instructor a couple weeks ago if she would watch me do all my material, every kata I'm supposed to know up to this point, so that she could pick it apart.  I wanted her help to nit-pick starting now, so that a month before black belt testing, I'm not panicking because there are all of these little things that have been piling up. 

One of the classes I go to is packed with white and yellow belts, so the black belt class (where it is often just me and one or two other people) is the right time and place to start working on all the little nuances.  Tonight, it was just me and my instructor on the floor. I started with my first kata, Nai Hanchi Shodan.  The suggestions came from my instructor and from a black belt who has been taking a break and was just observing from the back: widen nai hanchi stance, push the knees out more, make that strike parallel, make sure not to double block from the inside, the leg lift needs to be out in front, not on the inside, etc. etc. etc.

All this from a kata I thought I knew like the back of my hand.

I have so much to work on.  I'm so glad I'm starting now.

"I know nothing, nothing, NOTHING. . ."

In the beginning

Thanks to Dani and Becky for submitting questions.  Man, either my blog is an open book and you know everything you ever wanted to about me, or you just don't care to know any more.  Either way, it's all good.  I answered Becky's question via email.  Dani's could be an entire book. . .

Dani posed this question: What inspired/motivated you to start karate, and what inspires you to continue?

When I was growing up, I always thought it would be cool to know karate.  I thought that you went to a karate school and you learned all kinds of secret things, like if you push your finger on a person's knee at just the right spot, they would fall over in pain and die. 

The problem was that I was so busy with field hockey, softball, athletic training, student council, french club, ping-pong club (yes you heard me correctly), lousy boyfriends, playing the saxophone, etc. etc. etc. that I really didn't have time to even look into the possibility of taking karate classes.  I didn't know a single person who took karate and I knew next to nothing about it. 

When I went to college, I was required to take physical education credits.  Karate was an option and I was very interested in taking the course.  But then I heard that the final exam for the class was walking through the streets of Pittsburgh and being randomly attacked by people they had throughout the streets and that scared the living daylights out of me.  Instead, I took a life guarding refresher class so I would be able to have a cool job the next summer, and then followed that with a dance class that I failed (That's an entirely different post).   

As a volunteer PEER Educator on my college campus, I spoke to many people about rape and sexual assault through those years.  Every once in a while we would have seminars on campus where we would bring in these awesome martial artists who would do demonstrations on fighting off knife attacks, gun attacks and other unpleasantries.   I thought it was so cool, but I was really busy with college classes, work, and Mr. BBM.  So, I continued my years in college hearing about these karate classes and wanting to take them so badly, but I was just too busy and honestly too afraid.  I bought a big can of mace instead.

There were a great many years that followed college: grad school, moving to DE, moving to PA, moving to NJ, moving back to PA and I never even gave karate a thought. 

Then I had Big I. 

I always had these things I like to call "action plans."  I think about a potentially bad scenario like a fire in my house or an attacker in a parking lot and I create a plan in my head as to what I would do.  Some people might call that a mental illness; I call it being prepared.  For as long as I can remember, I have always thought about these types of things. 

I began thinking about them more and more after I had my first daughter.  What if someone attacked me while I was putting her in her car seat?  What if someone tried to take my daughter? 

Then my husband took a job where he was traveling constantly and my mental illness action plans took on a whole new life.  I walked through parking lots with my keys sticking out between my fingers; I formulated plans for a break-in when I was by myself with the baby.  I felt scared and powerless and I didn't like it one bit. 

When Big I turned three she wanted to go to Princess Camp.  It was a summer full of princess activities and her friend/neighbor wanted to go as well.  Each week, we would go early and watch Big I's friend take karate classes before we would eat dinner and the girls would take Princess Camp.  Big I loved watching her friend wear sparring gear and learn to kick and punch. 

It was at the end of one of these classes that the instructors came out and started talking to all the observers and parents.  Apparently, the dance school was growing and they didn't have room for the karate classes anymore.  I was disappointed because Big I had just started expressing an interest in starting karate and I was more than happy to switch out Princess Camp for Karate. 

To make a long conversation short, I found out about my dojo through the instructors and a group of us decided that we would enroll our kids in the karate school and that we, the parents, would also start classes.  We began as a great group with three families, each with one kid taking karate.  Now, Big I and I are the only ones left from our group. 

Karate sort of fell into my lap.  I'd always had this interest, but it wasn't something I sought out.  It sort of found me at just the right time.  Karate helps me create workable action plans, feel more confident, and it keeps me centered in a way I never imagined it would or could.  I wanted to take karate for so many reasons, but the reason that I continue to go and be motivated today is because karate has become such a huge part of who I am and who I want to be. 

I get lots of hits on this site from people searching for the fastest way to a black belt and the styles with the least amount of requirements to get to black belt.  It really surprises me because when I started I never imagined I'd be anywhere close to getting a black belt.  That was never why I started.  When I first started going I thought that it would be really cool if I could become a green belt some day.  I didn't know what being a green belt meant.  Heck, I didn't know what being a white belt meant.  All I knew is that I felt pretty cool when I ran in to the pizza shop to pick up a pie wearing my gi. 

It's funny because as a white belt I knew how to get out of a basic wrist grab and I thought I was invincible.  I wanted to flaunt that I took karate.  I remember that when our group got our yellow belts, we wanted to wear them out in public.  We felt all big and bad. Now, I don't wear my gi anywhere unless it's just to run into the store quickly.   And I never wear the gi jacket, only the pants.  I figure most people probably just think I'm wearing scrubs anyway.  I don't flaunt it because I don't want to invite trouble, and because I don't have to wear my gi to show my karate anymore.  It comes from within, and the knowledge and confidence that I've developed from karate is just a part of me now, not defined by some exterior uniform or color on a belt. 

When I miss a class or two (like this week since I've decided to keep my germs to myself), things don't feel right.  Even when we're working on something intimidating like blindfolded self defense, I leave the dojo afterwards feeling refreshed and calm.  I can't imagine not doing karate.  I think I will probably be one of those 80-year old women still doing kata and showing kids how its done.  At least, that's what I hope I'll be some day, a long time from now. 

I started karate to calm the action plans; but I continue because it's who I am and I can't imagine my life without it.   

Nothing

I have been ridiculously sick since the weekend.  The only way it is possible for me to not go through a box of tissues every five minutes is if I take cold medicine.   I don't do well on cold medicine at all.  Even if I take the child's dose, cold medicine equals coma for me. 

Apparently Benadryl also kills creative juices because I have absolutely nothing to say, unless of course you'd like to hear about how many tissues I've been through in the past few days or the fact that I could really use someone to flip the covers on and off me at 5-minute intervals throughout the night because the chills/hot flashes are coming at about that frequency. 

Yes, it has been a fun week.  I am almost completely convinced that Lil C's allergic reaction gave me such stress that it sent me spiraling into a sinus infection/flu/allergy nightmare.  (She is now 100% fine by the way, and thank you for all your reassuring comments and concern.)

I've noticed a lot of bloggers opening up the floor and asking readers what they'd like to know.  So since I am lacking any and all material this week and since karate class is looking like it won't be happening this week, I invite you to pose a question to Black Belt Mama.  I can't guarantee I'll answer them all, and I really can't guarantee that I'll even remember writing this post because, well, Benadryl.  But if there's something you're dying to know, ask away in the comments section or email me at bbm at blackbeltmama dot com.  I'll answer the questions in an upcoming post. 

And please, ask me something because I really don't want to have to, in a Benadryl induced semi-conscious state, create questions to answer because you were all too lazy to help me out.  In the interest of me not having to create my own pathetic questions, I'll provide links to your blog if you ask one.  So ask away. . .   

And that about does it for today.  Where's my Benadryl?   

Scary Day

Lil C had what appears to be a severe allergic reaction to an antibiotic she was on for an ear infection.  She started with a couple hive-like bumps on her legs.  Today, the few small hives erupted into a full fledged all out attack on her joints.  Lil C's knees swelled to about four times their normal size.  Her wrists, fingers, ankles, and toes were swollen too.  She had hives everywhere from the top of her little head to the tops of her little feet. 

I talked to my Mom this morning and told her I was concerned.  I didn't want to be an alarmist though so I thought I would give her a bath and see how she was.  It was when I started undressing her that I saw how much worse it had gotten in only an hour.  I immediately called the doctor, and then drove her frantically as fast as I could to the appointment. 

As the doctor asked me questions about whether or not rheumatoid arthritis or Lupus runs in our family, it was all I could do not to cry.  It was terrifying to watch her swell up so severely, so suddenly.  My Mom works for an allergist so I know how serious allergic reactions can be. 

The doctor put her on oral steroids and round the clock benadryl and we're supposed to watch her closely over the next 48 hours.  Hopefully, an allergic reaction is all that is was and it will all go away.  Tonight, she seems much better already. 

I couldn't help but think about the little girl Julia, whose battle with cancer I've been following over the past several months.  My fear and panic today is probably only a fraction of what her mother feels every single day, and has been feeling every day since her daughter first got sick.  I pray for that little girl every single night, but I'm going to make sure I remember her family in my prayers as well. 

It was an absolutely terrifying day. I hope that this ordeal is over and that we won't have any more incidents like this ever again.

Update:  As of Sunday night, Lil C is doing much better.  Her joint swelling is pretty much gone.  We're still dealing with an occasional hive popping up here and there, some itchy eyes, and some minor bruising under the skin where the swelling was the most severe.  But it appears that we are out of the woods for now and that is a HUGE relief.   

BBM Challenge is BACK!

I started the BBM Challenge and then didn't post about it often enough at all. It seems to have been dying a slow death.  Well, the BBM Challenge was never gone; but now it's back in full force.  My family and I have been sparring over the past few months when we get the chance to do so (I know, so lame, because we need to make it a priority).  When I say "family," I mean FAMILY, as in all of us.

Lil C's favorite thing these days is to demand that things be put "ON" and she demanded the same of my sparring gear.  I've been trying to teach her how to punch and do knife hands.  The knife hands are coming along nicely, and she can even throw a decent little snap kick (mostly when getting her diaper changed).  By far though, her best karate skill is the kiai, which is awesome!  She also does a fairly nice growl, which will come in handy as well. 

And when she's not growling, kicking, or kiaiing. . . sparring gear helps to create a fabulous game of Peek-a-Boo. 

Here she is asking where her next opponent is, as she had already taken Dada down to the ground.  And speaking of taking Dada down, the last time that Mr. BBM and I sparred, I felt like I made some real improvement. 

If you're a martial artist and you want to improve your sparring skills, you need to read Living the Martial Way.  There are some excellent tips in that book for how to improve your sparring skills.  I also think that karate camp was a huge help to me.  Despite the agony of the kicking drills session, I was able to take a lot of good information away from that session.  Without going into too much detail, the most important thing I learned in that session is to get out of the way.  It sounds simple but when you're sparring in a controlled environment, it's easy to be concentrating on your next move so much that you let your body get in the way of a kick or two. 

The last time I sparred, I felt like I had improved greatly as far as quickness and retaliating against a kick goes.  I think Mr. BBM would probably agree with that assessment because it wasn't long into our session before he was telling me that his head hurt and he didn't feel good (i.e. excuses for why my wife is kicking my butt). 

Instead of just making improvements in sparring my goal, I have added abdominal exercises to the routine daily (and have stuck with it for the past 2-3 weeks now), an exercise that Mr. BBM tells me will improve total body toning (sort of like a squat that explodes up into raising the weights over your head and back down again), push-ups (which truthfully aren't happening as often as they should because I hate, hate, hate them), and other light weight-lifting.   

So, with about three months to go until the BBM family hits the beach, we are in full BBM Challenge mode here and I invite you to do the same.  Pick up your challenge where you left off, or feel free to join for the first time.  If you'd like to create a fitness or other type of goal and be added to the Challenge blogroll, just shoot me an email or leave a comment and I'll send you the button and code. . . the more the merrier.   

You might be old if. . .

Mr. BBM and I went out with my sister and some of her friends on Saturday night.  We had a blast.  I haven't been out in a very LONG time, so it was nice to have dinner without the girls for a change.  We also went to Dave & Buster's and then hit a cool bar that had a great band playing.  Mr. BBM, my sister and I all "got our groove on."  It was a nice night out. 

Mr. BBM and I right before we went out. . .

I did realize, however, that my crowd of people was certainly a bit older looking than the rest of the crowd.  Here are some of the ways you can tell you might be a little older than the rest of the crowd:

1.  You get to and from the bar in a mini-van.  The people in the back seat may have been intrigued by the Elmo video playing on a constant loop.   

2.  You don't get carded.

3.  The drunken guy who says, "How you DOIN''?" as he stumbles up the stairs behind you looks to you like he's about 14.

4.  The song "You down with OPP" draws you out to the dance floor.  I still don't know what that song means, but it makes you want to dance. (Just so you know, I'd like to remain completely naive as to what that song means so please don't tell me.)

The rest of our crowd, NOT drawn out to the dance floor by OPP.  One of the crowd was researching on the internet via cell phone.  That is how you know you're a dork (or K-Jo which is the new nickname for the one in our crowd who was a "Kill Joy".)

5.  You know every single word to the old school rap music mix played while the band breaks, including the songs, "The Choice is Yours" ("You can get with this, or you can get with that. . . this is where it's at. . .") "Humpty Dance," and "Doin' the Butt."

6.  You also know all the appropriate dance moves to go with said songs, and you don't care one bit how stupid you look while doing them.

Me and . . . um, err. . . blacked out eyes have been added to protect the innocent (i.e. person whose work-mates sometimes read this blog. . . Hi Girls!)

7.  You start chanting for Salt 'N Pepa's "Push it" because Duh, that's obviously a song that should go with that set!

8.  When a guy on the dance floor tells you he likes your shirt, you totally believe that he really likes your shirt and that it isn't a ploy to get your number.

9.  The last call jello shot totally does you in.  You realize this too late, as your sister pulls out from her wallet the yellowing piece of paper that you gave her when she went off to college that says, "Beer before Liquor-Never Sicker; Liquor before Beer-In the Clear; Liquor before Wine-Feeling Fine; Wine before Liquor-Can't get much sicker; Wine Before Beer-Have no Fear." 

10. Instead of singing along with the radio on the way home, you promptly fall asleep as does everyone else in the van (minus the designated driver of course), as soon as you realize that the designated driver is not going to stop at McDonald's despite the urgent plea's to do so. 

This night out marked the first time that Lil C spent the night at the grandparents house, AND she did AWESOME!  When we picked the girls up on Sunday, my Mom said, "You should do this more often. . ." to which I responded, "Yeah, how about next weekend?  Same time?  Same place?" 

We old people definitely need to go out more often to show the young ones how it's done! 

2nd Kyu

Testing was this morning; promotions are later in the week.  I passed my test for 2nd kyu-two black stripes on my brown belt. 

There were about 22 people testing today, mostly white belts going for second stripes or yellow belts.  We have such a large group right now.  When I started there was a decent sized group too, but my groups' numbers have dropped tremendously.  Some people moved; some people quit.  After green and brown belts people seem to start dropping like flies. 

There is a lot to remember as you move up in the ranks.  Thankfully, I remembered it all today, which was a nice change from last time. 

Today was the first time that I didn't really get nervous at testing.  I think that the blindfolded self defense was a big confidence builder for me and it gave me a boost I needed. 

The one white belt who was an attacker the other night was testing for his yellow belt today.  I asked him if his finger was o.k. from when I cracked it pretty good.  He said his finger was fine; it was his knees that were hurting him.  I had no recollection of hurting anyone's knees so I asked him what I did.  He told me that when he grabbed the front of my gi with both hands, I peeled him off and took him down unexpectedly.  I told him I didn't even realize I had done that, and told him I was sorry.  He said it was no big deal.  I have to admit I am feeling pretty good about the fact that I took a big guy down without even realizing it.  It's funny how your body just does things without you even realizing it.  Muscle memory is so cool.

So testing is finished and I'll have a new black stripe to add to my collection.  There's only one more test before black belt.  I've got a lot of work to do. 

It doesn't have to be pretty

At karate tonight, I had an opportunity to face one of my very worst fears.  For my 1st kyu test, I will need to do self defense while blindfolded.  I'm a little claustrophobic to begin with, and the idea of having people just come up and grab you when you can't see them is a little nerve-wracking to say the least.  Our instructor looked around our dojo tonight, saw the large group of 12 we had and decided that tonight was a perfect night to give it a shot. 

Most of the white belts became observers while the black belts and I took turns being attacked.  The group of attackers consisted of my 3rd dan male black belt instructor, two other black belts (one male, one female), me, a male white belt who is big, strong and scary and a female white belt who is the little sister of my instructor (in other words-has been beat on for many years so she's quite a formidable opponent herself).

My instructor went first.  I thought he was going to do basic techniques, but he continued the counter-attack until most of us were on the ground and in pain.  At one point, I was tangled up on the ground with my wrist twisted so severely that I had no choice but to start tapping the ground.  It was either that or scream.  (I'm trying to work on the whole girly screaming thing.)

The male black belt went next and he did a great job too.  Plus he saved me the humiliation of having to go after my instructor.  Thank you Mr. W!

Then it was my turn.  I was a nervous wreck.  These attacks were not gentle attacks.  They were coming with a decent amount of force and the attackers weren't just letting go.  I was so nervous that I wouldn't be able to get out of something.  But what choice did I have? I tried to tell them that I needed to go make an important call, but no one bought it. 

It felt like eternity before the first attack came.  I could hear the attackers walking in a circle around me and it was unsettling hearing the gi's swish and move, not knowing where the first attack would come from.  I thought they would start off with a gentle wrist grab or something to break in the brown belt, but that was not the case.  I think the first attack was a forearm choke.  I got out of it and tried to compose myself again.  The attacks that followed included a hair pulling from behind, chokes from the front and back, bear hugs, wrist grabs, lapel grabs, a joint-locked elbow that took me to my knees before I could get out, a double-wrist grab from behind with pulling, full nelsons, etc. etc. 

I tried to think about nothing.  I didn't want to anticipate the next attack or over think the previous one.  Sometimes I got frustrated when I couldn't get out at first, but when something didn't work I tried to change it up until I found something that did.  I took a deep breath after each attack to try to clear it away and prepare for the next one. 

It wasn't pretty, but as my instructors always say, "It doesn't have to be pretty; it just has to work."  At one point, I cracked the white belt's finger pretty good. There was just no other way to get out of it.  I wasn't the only one who went after the towering white belt.  The other black belt girl pulled his hair really good at one point.  He's a formidable opponent now; he's going to be wicked good when he gets up in the ranks. 

When I was finished my instructor said I did a good job and that what I did would certainly pass the 1st kyu test.  He said the only difference between doing a good job and doing a really good job is eliminating the brief hesitation I had at the on-set of some of the attacks.  I have to stop thinking about it and just start doing it. 

One of the white belt women who watched came up to me after class and told me she thought I did an amazing job.  It felt really good to get some praise over something that I was so unsure about at the beginning of class. 

I know it wasn't perfect, but I also know that on the street I wouldn't be limiting myself to the techniques I used tonight.  I'd also be throwing elbows, punches, and strategic kicks (if you know what and where I mean).

I'm reading a book right now called, "Living the Martial Way" and it is a fabulous read for any martial artist.  I just read last night about how you should seek out the biggest, toughest person at the dojo to train against because it will only make you better.  In the book, the author also talks about how you should know what it feels like to be attacked with a decent amount of force so you can find out how you'll react.  He says it is an essential part of the martial arts training if you want me be considered a true warrior and a true martial artist. 

My instructor definitely put those two suggestions to good use tonight; and the feeling that I had driving home from class and writing this now is nothing short of euphoric.  I know I can improve, but what I did tonight was a really good start.      

Only One Thing Worse. . .

There is only one thing worse than being Antonella Barba, the contestant whose racy photos are all over the internet . . .

Being her parents. 

I can not even imagine what they are going through right now.  As a parent of two daughters, I would be shocked and horrified if my daughter's photos started appearing all over the internet.  According to rumors in the form of news articles, the collection of photos were part of a calendar she gave to her long-time boyfriend (whom she dumped as soon as she got a ticket to Hollywood).  What did she think was going to happen with those photos?  As soon as she got her golden ticket to Hollywood, they became more valuable than she would ever know. 

Boyfriend is a transient term; they can be here today, gone tomorrow.  Truth be told, I wouldn't advocate creating a calendar with racy photos in it for anyone, including a husband.  Any and all relationships can come to bad endings and no one wants photo baggage following them around.  The problem is that once those photos have been taken, they can end up anywhere.  In Antonella's case, it's cyberspace fame and glory, but certainly not what she had hoped. 

I think that she will probably be sent packing tonight after a dismal try at a Celine Dion classic, and I certainly hope that's the case.  As a parent who likes to watch American Idol with my children, I can tell you that, in my opinion, Antonella is certainly no "American Idol."  It is possible, however, to learn something from her unfortunate circumstances.  Hopefully young girls will consider what they'd like to become famous for, and leave the nude/suggestive photos well alone.