Black Belt Mama

Kicking off the Summer

We decided to kick off the summer right this year, and spent Memorial Day weekend in Ocean City, MD.  There are benefits to having a husband who traveled 24/7 for two years. . . hotel points.  We spent the weekend in the new Hilton Oceanfront Suites and it did not disappoint.  We had a living room, a bedroom with two queen beds, a full kitchen and a fabulous jacuzzi tub in the bathroom that made more bubbles than Lil C could have ever imagined.  We also had some cool chairs that are Lil C approved.

We also had a fabulous oceanfront view that Lil C enjoyed immensely.  I mostly just freaked out and continued to test the rails to make sure they were up to my standard. 

   

In addition, there were two oceanfront pools.  One had a swim-up bar that I did not get to enjoy despite the fact that I kept telling Mr. BBM that he was "on duty" and that I was going to go make some new friends at the bar.  I'm all talk apparently. 

The other was a kiddie pool where I spent most of our time getting splashed by some kid who thought my legs were pool toys.  I started to seriously consider practicing some take downs, especially when he got his little hands all in order to splash Lil C again, after both of us and his Dad told him to knock it off.  Mr. BBM and I also took about 3000 turns each catching Lil C at the bottom of a kiddie slide, when Mr. BBM wasn't taking a ride himself.  Lil C also cleared out her sinuses in the fountains that were just the right height for a good shock to the nostrils.   

 

Lil C also enjoyed hanging out with her new buddy, the whale.  That partially-transparent-because-she's-so-white-girl is me, and that's the most you'll be seeing of my new swimsuit which was so delayed at Victoria's Secret that I went out and bought a different one.

   

During our short stint on the actual beach, Lil C thought it was particularly funny to dump a bucket full of sand on my head.  She also found the freezing cold waves pretty hysterical, especially when they splashed her "bum bum."  The weekend was fabulous, minus the four hours it took us to get out of our actual room and down to the pool or beach each day.  Putting sunscreen on children is completely exhausting.   

Unlike North Carolina beaches where we go each year, Ocean City has a much younger crowd especially this time of year.  A popular destination for Senior Week, I was reminded of the stark difference between my visit to OC MD 13 years ago compared to now, with two children.  The difference is huge. 

Thirteen years ago, I was partying with my friends after graduating high school.  This weekend, I spent a large proportion of my time trying to get Lil C to sit in a high chair and/or just let me breathe for a minute.  This is her idea of hanging out with Mommy, or "Me" as she likes to call me.  We are officially in the "clingy" stage.

And then there's my other kid who's not clingy in the tiniest bit, which had me constantly scanning the pool and freaking out when I couldn't find her and her cute little floral bikini.

So to those going off to Senior Week within the next few weeks, my message to you is simple:  Enjoy it, because in 10-15 years you're going to be a little less hot (a little people, not much), and a lot more busy putting sunscreen on little munchkins.  You'll trade your Coppertone oil in for SPF 50 minimum.  Gone are the nights spent partying until 2 a.m.  In fact, 10:30 starts looking like a pretty reasonable bedtime after a day at the beach.  The good news is that you'll spend a lot less money on beer in the future; and instead of laughing at your drunk friends, you'll be laughing along with your kids who are having an absolute blast.      

Meme Times Three

I’ve been tagged for about 400 meme’s over the past week or so.  They are all below.  Feel free to play along if you like.  The first two are courtesy of Becky.  I thought I'd add the details of my second munchkin behind the details of the first. The last one is from my fellow brown belt, the Blue Chair Karate-Ka.

Mommy Meme

1. WAS YOUR PREGNANCY PLANNED? 

Big I: Yes and no.  I remember crying in the car and talking to my husband about how badly I wanted to start our family because I wanted my kids to know my grandparents, etc.  Turns out I was pregnant.  At least it explains the tears.  I’m not typically one to cry.

Lil C:  Yes and no.  After 14 months of no luck, I had given up.  That's when I got pregnant.

2. WERE YOU MARRIED AT THE TIME? 

Big I: Yes, for a little less than two years.

Lil C: Yes.

3. WHAT WERE YOUR REACTIONS? 

Big I:  I was so excited, but I was sort of in shock too.  There were just so many unknowns and not enough formulated action plans yet.  Mr. BBM immediately put the date on the calendar and started calling family.  I hit the books and freaked out about the possibility of hemorrhoids.

Lil C:  I was so relieved that it had finally happened.  I couldn't wait to tell Big I!

4. WAS ABORTION AN OPTION FOR YOU?  Never.                     

5. HOW OLD WERE YOU? 

Big I: 25 when I got pregnant; 26 when I had her.

Lil C: 29 when I got pregnant; 30 when I had her.

6. HOW DID YOU FIND OUT YOU WERE PREGNANT? 

Big I:  E-P-T and there was no doubt.  I remember looking at the two lines only seconds after I started the test and thought, "well, I have to wait until the three minutes are up."  I was just so shocked that it was positive.

Lil C:  I took a First Response-Early Results test and got a faint pink line.  The next day, I took another test and there was no doubt.

7. WHO DID YOU TELL FIRST? 

Big I and Lil C: Mr. BBM

8. DID YOU WANT TO FIND OUT THE SEX? 

Big I:  No, I figured not knowing would be my incentive to push and get through the pain.  Little did I know that because of the pain, the only thing I would care about is getting “it out” (Yes, that’s a direct quote.)

Lil C:  I wasn't going to, but then when I had to have an ultrasound I figured why not?

9. DUE DATE? 

Big I: My first due date was March 10 (my Dad's deceased Mom's birthday).  They later moved my due date to March 24th (Mr. BBM's birthday); but like everyone else from my family, she was late and arrived on March 28^th (but only after hours of double-strength pitocin and lots of Exorcist like action).

Lil C:  October 3, 2005

10. DID YOU HAVE MORNING SICKNESS? 

Big I:  Hell yeah.  I couldn't even brush my teeth without gagging.  Everything made me sick.  I was teaching at the time and students would come up to me with brochures to buy different foods for fundraisers.  I’d start gagging and heaving and would have to send them away until after lunch.  Sometimes the sickness lasted all day long.

Lil C:  Not really.  I had two weeks where I felt sort of off and had to watch what I ate.  Then I was fine.

11. WHAT DID YOU CRAVE? 

Big I:  Auntie Ann's Jalapeno Soft Pretzels with cheese sauce, Cherry ICEE's, red meat and cheese (I ate my first Prime Rib dinner while a few months pregnant), and later in the pregnancy, anything with apples (applesauce, cider, juice, cereal).

Lil C:  Salad (because it was one of the only things I could eat without having to count carbs and watch sugar), hamburgers (no roll) and an occasional piece of dark chocolate when I had a low blood sugar. 

12. WHO/WHAT IRRITATED YOU THE MOST? 

Big I:  I had three 10th grade students in one of my classes who were all pregnant.  What annoyed me was that they thought we were pregnancy buddies or something. I made it very clear that we were not.  I also couldn’t stand what I like to call “belly rubbers”: people who tried to rub mine and people who couldn’t quit rubbing their own.

Lil C:  All the appointments. . . having gestational diabetes got to be a real pain in the butt.  I couldn't wait until she was finally born.

13. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CHILD'S SEX? 

Both: Girls

14. DID YOU WISH YOU HAD THE OPPOSITE SEX OF WHAT YOU WERE GETTING? 

Both: No, I just wanted a healthy baby.

15. HOW MANY POUNDS DID YOU GAIN THROUGHOUT THE PREGNANCY? 

Big I:  30+ but I lost it all within four weeks of giving birth.

Lil C:  18, and it was gone after two weeks

16. DID YOU HAVE A BABY SHOWER? 

Big I: Yes, four to be exact.

Lil C: No.

17. WAS IT A SURPRISE OR DID YOU KNOW? I didn't see the one coming from the science department (Mr. BBM taught science).

18. DID YOU HAVE ANY COMPLICATIONS DURING YOUR PREGNANCY?

Big I: No.

Lil C: Yes, gestational diabetes.

19. WHERE DID YOU GIVE BIRTH?

Big I:  Christiana Hospital in Delaware

Lil C:  A hospital instead of the birth center.  Big bummer.

20. HOW MANY HOURS WERE YOU IN LABOR?

Big I:  14.5

Lil C:  15

21. WHO DROVE YOU TO THE HOSPITAL?

Both: Mr. BBM

22. WHO WATCHED YOU GIVE BIRTH?

Big I:  The doctor, an annoying nurse, Mr. BBM, my Mom, and although he didn't actually watch, my Dad was also in the room staring intently out the window at the parking lot.

Lil C:  My midwife, a nurse, and Mr. BBM.

23. WAS IT NATURAL OR C-SECTION?

Both:  Natural

24. DID YOU TAKE MEDICINE TO EASE THE PAIN?

Big I:  No epidural, but I did have a shot of stadol to help my muscles relax so she would move down already.  That was about the only thing it helped because it didn't do a damn thing for the pain except make me care less that I was in agony.  It also made me swear. . . a lot.

Lil C:  No, nothing.

25. HOW MUCH DID YOUR CHILD WEIGH?

Big I:  8 lbs 0 oz. with a head circumference in the 95^th percentile.  This came as a surprise to everyone but me.  Man that hurt.

Lil C:  7 lbs. 10 oz. with a head circumference in the 95th percentile. Um, hum.  Yeah. 

26. WHEN WAS YOUR CHILD ACTUALLY BORN ?

Big I:  March 28, 2001 at 1:29 a.m.

Lil C:  October 4, 2005 at 1:05 a.m.

27. WHAT DID YOU NAME HIM/HER?

Big I:  Big I (Sorry folks that's all you're getting.) She has a fabulous first name and shares her middle name with both me and my Mom.

Lil C:  Lil C has a great first name and beautiful middle name too. 

28. HOW OLD IS YOUR FIRST BORN TODAY?  Six and Lil C is 19 months.

7 Random Facts About Me

1.      I’m one of those people who get involved.  When I was in college, some poor kid was getting beat to a pulp by a group of gang-banger types in a large dorm lobby.  While a crowd of about 40 people stood around doing nothing, I cut through the crowd, grabbed the bloody kid off the ground, and walked him out of the circle of on-lookers to an office where the cleaning people locked the door behind us and called for help.  The group of guys beating him stood there just looking at me with these stupid looks on their faces.  I think they were just so shocked that some skinny blonde chick would just waltz into their fight fest and stop it.  For me, there was no choice.  I had to help.

2.      The blonder I am, the more positive an outlook I have on life.

3.      I took French classes for five years, but I mostly just remember the swear words.

4.      I have terrible road rage.

5.      I have even worse parental rage.  When someone does something to one of my kids or says something about one of them, or hurts their feelings. . . I could just kill.

6.      I consider myself to be very interested in politics; but as of right now I have absolutely no idea which candidate I like better.  I do know the ones I don’t like.

7.      Even though I can’t really sing, I still fantasize about being a big star, selling out stadiums, and making tons of money.

Five Favorite Places to Eat

Max & Erma’s: I have been writing this restaurant chain for years and begging them to open up a restaurant near my house.  Right now, I have to drive at least 45 minutes to get to the closest one, but it is well worth it for the Tortilla soup and Santa Fe salad.

Stokesay Castle:  I had my wedding reception at this amazing location on top of a mountain in the woods.  The castle is a replica of an actual European castle and is amazing.  The food was always decent (although not amazing), but you can’t beat the ambience.  Sadly, the restaurant is closed and the castle is now for sale.

Panda Heaven:  This is our local hibachi restaurant and although I haven’t been there for a long time, I absolutely love the food.  The last time I was there, I was pregnant and had green tea ice cream.  I was totally stuffed and haven’t gotten rid of that way-too-full feeling yet, so I haven’t been back in a long time.

Bruno’s Pizza:  This pizzeria has been around forever.  When I was a teenager, it used to be the place where all the hot guys hung out on weekend nights in the summer.  Now, it’s just the place I grab a pizza and wings from when I can’t bear to think about cooking. 

Emily’s:  The last time I was there, I had crab cakes with a green olive tartar sauce that was out of this world.  Their crab stuffed mushrooms appetizer was amazing too.  I can always count on having a good glass of wine there too.   

I am now totally meme’d out.  I’m sure you are too!  If you need me, I'll be unpacking from a long weekend at the beach, and cleaning sand out of my ears courtesy of Lil C.

   

Sparring is Mental and Blood is Cool

I don't suck at sparring. 

One simple statement and it makes a world of difference.  I feel like I've rounded a corner in my training.  I feel like I had a major break last night.  When I arrived for class, we were told to gear up.  Instead of filling up with dread and doubt, I made a conscious effort to do the opposite.  I gave myself a pep talk.

"You are going to go out there and spar.  You are not going to apologize while sparring.  You are not going to doubt yourself.  You are not going to plan your moves.  You are going to watch, react, and attack based on what your gut is telling you, not your brain.  You are going to spar and you are going to do it well." 

And then I went out on the floor and ran through some drills.  I had a rare opportunity to work with another brown belt.  We worked on some kicking and punching drills.  After we were warmed up, we did tournament style sparring with three judges.  Since I have never attended a tournament (and probably never will) I asked for clarification on the rules and what constitutes a point.  And then, contrary to what I do every other time I spar, I made no action plans.  I forced myself to stay open mentally and concentrated on just being there and being in the moment.

I first sparred against the other brown belt.  I wanted to be nervous.  She has sparred in tournaments and I know she has done well.  I forced myself to not think about it. 

I used front leg kicks and back fists to the head.  At one point I got a kick up to her head.  I sort of shocked myself.  I got the first point; she got the second and then I got two more.  My instructor and another black belt complimented me on my going in high and my front leg kicks.  Those compliments felt so good. 

At one point my instructor stopped the match and went in to spar with my opponent to give her some tips against my long arms.  Both of the black belts told her that she wasn't going to outreach me, so they gave her some tips on what to do instead.  Apparently there are some benefits to having primate arms. 

After sparring with her, they asked me to choose another opponent and I chose a second degree black belt who I've never sparred before.  He gave me some good advice on how to further utilize the front leg kicks and turn them into combination moves. 

Later I sparred against my fifth degree black belt instructor.  In my early days of karate, I used to follow him around the floor and kick him in the butt.  Please don't read that as "kick his butt" because "kicking someone's butt" and "kicking someone in the butt" are two very different things.  His stance is completely sideways and there are no openings to be easily found.  So, I would throw kicks up and just kick his butt because that's all he gave me.  It's a pretty ineffective way of sparring.  Last night I was better than the early days, but still not great.  I definitely need to work on strategy for sparring against someone whose stance is sideways. 

Mr. BBM tends to spar straight on and so I've come up with techniques to work against that.  Sideways is more difficult because trying to open a person up tends to get me side-kicked.  I'll have to work on that. 

What I don't need to work on is my new attitude towards sparring.  I was able to talk the nerves down enough to just go with it.  I kept repeating "sparring is mental" to myself.  And if my performance last night is any indication, I think my new mantra is dead on.

I'm not the only person who made progress this week.  Big I's progress was astounding to me.  She still doesn't have her kata nailed down yet, but she's had a bit of an attitude adjustment too; and it's one that I'm thrilled about. 

At the BBM household, there is always a lot of laundry.  Big I will get a small water droplet on her shirt and immediately go change.  Piece of fuzz that doesn't come right off?  Outfit change.  Tiny little dirt spot on her sock after playing outside??? Wardrobe malfunction!  New outfit required immediately. 

Last week, Big I got a brush burn on her knee.  At karate this week, she bumped the healing scrape and a few little droplets of blood appeared on her gi pants.  I was fully expecting a meltdown, complete with demands to let her change immediately.  She showed me the blood and I shrugged it off with a smile. 

"You have blood on your gi!?!" I exclaimed.  "Yes," she answered with an unsure look on her face.  "Wow!  That's cool.  You officially have a cool gi now Big I."  She responded with, "Since I have blood on my gi, does that make me tough?"

"Absolutely!" I said.  She got the biggest grin on her face and spent the rest of class admiring her blood stains.  It was another proud Mommy moment. . . one that didn't end with an immediate need for laundry detergent.  We have obviously both taken a positive turn in our training. 

Sparring is mental; and blood is indeed very cool.

Mamasource: The Non-Abbreviation Zone

I'm not really a message board kind of girl.  When I was pregnant for the first time I was teaching high school English.  Unfortunately, I can't count on one hand how many students handed in research papers or essays that included instant message lingo.  Many of my students used "2" for "to" and I'm pretty sure that I had several "LOL"'s in essays when they obviously shouldn't have been there.  Laughing out loud, I certainly was NOT. 

So, when I went looking for pregnant friends online, I found none.  I had enough "lingo" to deal with in the classroom.  Parenting and Pregnancy message boards left much to be desired.  I assumed "DH" meant, well, nickname for Richard plus add "head".  I never saw "Dear Husband" coming.  "TTC" which I've since learned is "trying to conceive" had me scratching my head and thinking that the person maybe had some spelling issues?  Trying to use the word tickle and took a very wrong turn?  Tank top and capri's?  I had no clue.  So I left them well enough alone.

When I was asked to do a review of Mamasource by Mother Talk, I fully expected to need a decoder key on the message boards.  I was pleasantly surprised to find that most of the Mom's online had no such code lingo, but instead use actual words and English. 

The other pleasant thing about Mamasource is that when you sign up, you are immediately put into a "community" with other Mom's from your area.  Since I don't live in San Francisco, NYC, or Philadelphia, I expected to be disappointed.  Instead, I found a great many reviews of local attractions, restaurants, and things to do from real live Mom's in my area.  Apparently I have one less excuse for having no local friends.

I spent time reading reviews of parks, doctors, restaurants, etc.  I also spent some time on the sight reading questions and posting answers on things I felt comfortable throwing my two cents in about.  To test it, I posted a question myself but I haven't received any responses as of yet.  (I asked about a certain neighborhood and it's reputation.) 

Although many of the Mom's in my area seem to be in their early to mid twenties, there were several I saw in their 40's and beyond.  Although I haven't made any real connections from the site as of yet, I think that it's entirely possible that I might.  Of course, the demographics of Mom's who actually take karate to those who just drive their kids to karate is probably a bit lacking, so I realize I probably just need to start being a bit less picky in choosing my friends.  Of course, the single 23-year old with four kids and mascara issues and I are probably not going to become fast friends; but I'm sure there are other Mom's out there like me who haven't had a shower since Sunday and could care less about which brand of mascara makes lashes longer, y'all (totally her words, not mine). 

Unlike many of the other parenting hot-spots online, Mamasource sends out a daily email that includes the latest requests and online reviews from Mom's in my area.  Although at first I was a bit annoyed at another intrusion on my inbox, I've found that the daily email has forced me to try to make connections.  With all the blogs I read each day, it would be entirely possible to just skip visiting Mamasource.  Instead, I have a daily reminder and can go visit the site if something piques my interest in the daily email. 

Despite the daily email, your identity and email is completely protected since the site has a strong anti-spam stance.  So, you can rest assured that no one will be asking you if you'd like to purchase some cialis.  Mary Kay products?  Entirely possible on the boards, but when it comes to enhancement drugs, it's a safe zone.

There's one last thing I'd like to add about Mamasource that I thought was pretty nice.  A Mom posted a question about how she could get her kids to sleep later since they wake at the crack of dawn.  One Mom responded with some snarky comment about her being selfish for wanting to sleep later.  (My area is known for being pretty rude, and we like to live up to that label.)  My response was that the sleep-deprived Mom should pull her daughter into bed with her and say "It's too early" and then pretend to be asleep.  It always worked for me, and was important because I likes me some sleep.  The next day, I saw that I was given a "flower" for my response.  Another random Mom out there liked my answer enough to award me a flower and I thought that was super sweet.  A message board with flowers for rewards and no abbreviations is pretty cool as far as my standards go. 

If you're a Mom and looking for a community of other Mom's in your area, Mamasource is the place to be.  TTYL, DR. TTCM  ("Talk to you Later, Dear Readers. Time to Check Mamasource" for those of you who are completely clueless.)      

Worst Start to a Monday EVER

7:15 AM-  Wake up Big I for school. 

7:30 AM-  Realize Big I is almost completely ready for school.  She may actually be EARLY for a change. 

7:45 AM-  Wake up Lil C and prepare to leave.

7:47 AM-  Go to my purse to get my keys and remember I left my keys in the diaper bag.

7:48 AM-  Frantically realize that diaper bag is locked in the car.

7:49 AM- Call Mr. BBM, who is already at work, who tells me to point the phone at the car while he hits the unlock button from 45 minutes away in his office because he obviously thinks he's McGuyver or something.

7:50 AM-  Run outside with Lil C in my arms to double-check that car is indeed locked.

7:51 AM-  Hear the front door slam behind me and see Big I standing outside the house.  Do the slow "NOOOOOOOOO" scream.  Realize that the three of us are now locked out of the car AND the house.

7:52 AM-  . . . but I still have the phone.  Hang up with Mr. BBM and call Mom.

7:53 AM-  Mom is on her way.  The three of us sit down and cuddle to keep warm because it is cool this morning.  We also fight a losing battle with a family of mosquito's who probably felt they had just discovered a buffet. 

8:16 AM-  Mom arrives, let's us in the house and hands me her keys to take Big I to school.

8:25 AM-  Pull into school and realize that the door Big I always goes in is now locked.  (This is her first time being late.)  She'll have to go in the office, which means I'll have to go in with her.  Realize that I am wearing bright lime green capri pajamas with cats all over them, a t-shirt from college that now has paint all over it. . . . and no bra to the school with the best dressed Mom's before 9 AM that I have ever seen.  We won't even begin to discuss the state of my hair.

8:26 AM-  Explain to entire office full of school personnel and extremely well-dressed Mom's why we're late.

8:27 AM- Return to car and drive home.

8:40 AM-  Mr. BBM calls from work and says that there's a valet key in the house that would have worked in the car, and indeed it does.

Where's Grammom Shopping???

Lil C has kindly decided to share her stomach virus with me.  It's been a fun week full of unintended weight loss and other unpleasantries.  I think I have the perfect work out plan: bronchitis (toned abs) chased with a nasty stomach virus (weight loss).  I'm going to have a beach bod simply from being sick.  I guess that is what's called looking at life with rose-colored glasses.  If you'd like to hear what it's been like you can go read this post from last summer, because it's pretty similar.  Subtract out the scallops and add in Lil C's virus as the culprit and that pretty much tells the story (minus the hospital this time around, thank God). . .

So due to my hiatus, here's a little something I prepared over the weekend which I think you'll enjoy. . .

My grandmother will turn 90 years old this June.  She never ceases to be empty-handed when she sees my kids.  Big I has about 4000 notebooks and/or coloring books that my grandmother has given her over the years (I, on the other hand, am never lacking dish towels for which she keeps me in constant supply). 

On Saturday, of Mother's Day weekend, we all got together.  My grandmother gave my daughter a little notebook and Big I went right to work on filling it up with pictures.  On Saturday night my parents watched the girls so Mr. BBM and I could have a very much needed night out. 

The next day we got a phone call from my Mom telling us we might want to get rid of Big I's new notebook from her Great-Grammom.  Here is the image and wording that appears on each page of the notebook. . .

Apparently, while Mr. BBM and I were out, Big I took a little closer look at that image and asked my Mom, "Why is that girl bunny looking down that boy bunny's pants?"  My Mom about fell over and did what any responsible Mom-Mom would do. . . she told Big I to go ask Pop-Pop.  My Dad took one close look at the image and wording and erupted into laughter.  Only after minutes of this was my Mom able to give Big I the likely (wink, wink) explanation that the girl bunny was just showing the boy bunny how much weight he had lost.  Way to go Mom! 

That convinced Big I for the time being.  Somehow I'm not convinced that explanation is the right one.  So my question is, who decides to put this kind of image on a notebook?  But more importantly, where is Grammom shopping??? 

A new "baby"

My Mother's Day gift arrived in the mail last week.  When I opened the box and unpacked all the styrofoam peanuts, what greeted me was a miniature tree, a bonsai tree.  The card was from "your karate kids" and it was a sweet and thoughtful gift.  Once I had the delicate tree out of the box, I saw a sheet of paper at the bottom of the box. 

The sheet was single-spaced, and typed on both front and back. . . the instructions for my bonsai tree's care.  For most plants, the care instructions can be fit on something the size of a small bookmark, but for the bonsai. . .

-Watering is crucial, but don't over-water and FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, don't under-water.

-Sunlight is crucial, but not too much direct sunlight and you better have a window that faces south or else the Bonsai Police are coming to take you away!

-Bonsai tree's do best outside, but ONLY when there is no threat of frost.  Bringing the plant inside once it starts to get cool again is a gradual process.  You actually have to bring the tree in for a few hours at a time to reacclimate the tree.  Talking to the tree to let it know it's going to be o.k is highly recommended (o.k. I added that last part). 

After reading the entire two pages, I started wishing the box contained a massage therapist instead, and started feeling like I now had three very temperamental children to care for.  And then, right at the end of the second detailed page?  A recommendation to buy the book about the complete care of the bonsai tree, because really, these two pages are just the basics. 

I'm including a picture of my bonsai tree now, because this is probably the best it will ever look. 

   

Mr. Miyagi, where are you????

Surprise Promotion

When I arrived at karate class tonight I was expecting some kata, waza, and maybe some self defense.  After a two week hiatus due to the cess pool of germs that is my house, I was feeling rusty and anxious to get back in the swing of things.  What I wasn't expecting was a promotion, but that's just what I got. 

1st kyu feels very surreal.  Surreal because I wasn't expecting this until June or September, and surreal because my next test will be for black belt.  It just doesn't seem possible because I feel like I have so much more to learn. 

I envisioned my testing for 1st kyu as very polished and a step-up from my other testing performances.  But truth be told, I've been working on my own to learn the last two kata's I need for Shodan and the three I needed for 1st kyu felt like they needed to be dusted off a bit. 

Testing was a bit informal this time around and promotions were moved up because two of our instructors are injured enough to require surgery within the next few weeks.  They didn't know if they would be up for testing in June, so it happened now. 

The only problem with tonight was Big I.  We have been working on Big I's material at home with a hopeful promotion in either June or September to green belt.  With t-ball and end of the year Kindergarten activities, she hasn't been practicing as much as she should be and she was not at all ready for green belt. 

Big I has been taking karate for three years now.  Tonight she watched other students who have been there for much less time get promoted to her rank and beyond.  I talked to her during class, as did my instructors, and told her that she has time to learn this kata the way it should be learned and that they will test her this summer.  Her response was that she didn't want to wait; but really, that was the only thing that made sense.  She's simply not ready.

I thought she was o.k. with this right up until we got in the car to come home.  Before she was even buckled she began to sob.  "I really want my green belt," she cried, and I felt horrible for her.  But then I told her what one of my instructor's told me a few weeks ago.  She said that when I go to black belt testing I will "take my black belt" instead of "testing for black belt" meaning that I will walk in there knowing my stuff so well that the only option is to promote me to Shodan. 

I asked her how she would feel if she was given a green belt without earning it.  I asked her to think about how good it will feel to get that belt after she's tested and done everything right.  After a good long cry she came around, but still insisted she was very sad. 

I told her to turn that sadness into motivation to learn, so that she can go into the dojo in another month or so and "take her green belt."  It was horrible as her Mom to see her so upset; but I think that she will look back on this disappointment as a very good lesson for life.  It doesn't matter what anyone else is doing, or how quickly anyone else is being promoted or moving along in this world.  The only thing that really matters is where she's going and how she's going to get there.  Although she didn't necessarily choose this path for herself, in the end she will have learned about discipline, determination, and eventually, how good it feels to succeed.  And that is certainly a lesson worth learning. 

Interview Meme

This has been going around the internet, even more rampant than the sicknesses around my household.  Since I'm practically a shut-in from the allergies turned bronchitis, and Lil C's virus I thought I'd participate.  J from Thinking About posed these five questions of me: 

Is there any food you could eat everyday without getting sick of it?

The only thing that comes to mind is dark chocolate.  I absolutely love dark chocolate, the darker the better. 

Do you consider yourself to be practical, a free spirit, or lazy?

This one is kind of tough since I think all those descriptions are so different.  I think I'm a pretty practical person.  I think I'm probably too high strung to be considered a free spirit although my birth sign strongly disagrees with that assessment.  Lazy?  Sometimes I can be, but when you consider that I'm a stay at home Mom, part time work from home recruiter, working on writing a book, Team Mom for Big I's t-ball team, and very much committed to my karate, I don't think lazy describes me at all. 

What do you consider to be the most important quality in a person?

Honesty.  I hate liars.  Just ask some of my ex-boyfriends.  Nothing makes my blood pressure go through the roof as much as when someone lies to me.  Along with honesty is just being a really good person, someone who is honest with others and also honest with themselves.  I can't stand when people are passive-aggressive and not direct about things either.  I think all of that falls under the category of honesty and I think that is the most important and admirable quality a person can have.

If you could change one thing about your personality, what would it be?

I wish I wasn't so sensitive about things.  It upsets me when people say things about me or my kids.  Things tend to just sit in my head and simmer for a while.  I can't seem to let rude comments go and I really wish I could.

Smoking or Non?  If non-smoking, have you ever been a regular smoker?

NON!  I am the person reporting people who throw cigarette butts out their windows.  I also tell smokers to move away from entrances to stores so that my kids don't have to inhale that crap; and I have no problem telling teenagers they're being stupid when I see them smoking or asking them to move away from me and my kids if they continue to be stupid. 

That being said (and PLEASE let this be the entry my parents do not read), I was stupid in college and when I was out and around my friends I occassionally smoked.  I can't even begin to say how much I regret having done that.  It was so stupid.  One day, I made up my mind that I was done and that was it.  I never did it again.  I wouldn't say I was a regular smoker at any point in my life though.

Here are the rules if you'd like to play:

1.  Leave me a comment saying "Interview Me."

2.  I will respond by emailing you five questions.  I get to pick the questions.

3.  You will update your blog with the questions and answers.

4.  You will include this explanation and offer to interview readers in the same post.

5.  When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Depending on how many more diapers I have to change today, it may take me a couple days to get these out if you choose to be interviewed. 

 

Renaming blog

I think I need to rename my blog.  Lately this place has been less about karate and more about sickness.  I'm thinking I should rename it "Barfed on Mama" or "Co-pay Blues" or something.  I was unable to make it to class again.

We got back from the hospital about two hours ago.  Lil C is very sick.  She spiked a fever of 105.4 today after her nap and had me an absolute wreck.  The doctor couldn't see her until this evening.  He checked her out thoroughly and decided to do a blood count.  No big deal right?  A finger stick and done, except Lil C's finger stick turned into two finger sticks.  When they wanted to do a third after she had thrown up all over the exam room, my husband and I said "NO!". 

The doctor came in, agreed with our decision and sent us to the hospital to rule out pneumonia.  The x-ray process was a nightmare.  Imagine a 19 month old baby being strapped into a plastic tube with her arms straight above her head.  I almost cried, but I knew I had to try to keep her from being a complete wreck.  My efforts were futile, but the x-ray came back negative. 

Tomorrow, we fill a prescription to combat the beginnings of an ear infection and hope that the rest of this stuff is just viral. 

Of course, you know what that means right?

You'll also be able to label this blog, "Black Belt Mama Barfs".  One thing is for sure; I'll either be cleaning it up or throwing up at some point this week.

And note to self: In the future, skip feeding ill child spinach. . . and I thought spaghetti was bad. 

Backorder Bummer

I haven't ordered anything from Victoria Secret in a long time, so I forgot how entertaining it is talking to the customer service people there. 

Back when I was in college, I called to order a swimsuit.  I placed my order and was ready with my credit card, but then the guy (because the VS customer service people are all guys it seems) says, "You know what would look really good with that swimsuit?"  Like an idiot, I indulged him and before I knew it I got a box the size of Texas in the mail complete with my swimsuit, underwear, shorts, sweatshirt, cover-up and about eight other tops. 

How did that happen?  Easily.  Take one customer service GUY who says things like "You'd look hot in that", add one insecure college girl and you've got a credit card disaster in the making. 

This morning, I logged onto Victoria Secret and ordered my swimsuit and then the computer told me that it was backordered.  Not only was it backordered in black; it was also backordered in emerald, red and pink.  It will not ship until May 24th so Memorial Day weekend at the beach will be spent watching the festivities from the sidelines, unless I can dig in my drawer and find something suitable.

I hate that you go through the whole ordering process only to find out at the end of the process that your swimsuit is currently being harvested from some spandex field in Thailand or something.  I started over several times with many different swimsuits and came to the conclusion that every swimsuit is backordered until about October, so it was pointless.  I had no idea there was a worldwide shortage of appropriate swimsuit material.  Someone should really be looking into this and making women aware in December so we could plan ahead.  I'm just going to have to take my chances that the one I want will come in early or just deal. 

I also had to call VS this morning to ask a question about sizing.  I got a male customer service representative and he asked for the item number.  Once he found my tankini, he exclaimed, "Ooh, that's cute!"  I mumbled something about hoping it would look as cute on me; and he saw an opportunity.  "Oh, I'm sure it will.  You're hot!  This is a camera phone." 

Back in my college days, I probably would have blushed and then purchased about $300 worth of clothing and other crap I didn't need and couldn't afford.  Today I said, "Yeah?  Well if this was a camera phone, then you would know that I am still in my oversized pajamas, haven't washed my hair in a few days, and I look and feel like crap."  Then I coughed.  I think he was convinced, because he laughed and then mumbled something about finding that sizing chart.  He knew his cover was blown. 

This morning, it may have taken me three hours to order my swimsuit, but at least all I ordered was a swimsuit and it might even be here by August.

This just in. . . Lindsay Lohan's Mom is currently burning up the phone lines trying to get the co-host job on The View.  Was there ever more of a reason to email Barbara for me???? 

Flat Abs Guaranteed

I don't know why I've wasted my time with Pilates or sit-ups, crunches or ab machines.  I've found the perfect way to tone and tighten abs without doing any exercising at all. . .

Bronchitis. 

I'm telling you, my stomach muscles have never been tighter than they are right now.  This wicked cough I have is totally paying off.  Sure, I have to deal with the hacking discomfort every time I cough; and yes, it certainly is unpleasant when those coughs become productive. But my abs I tell you, they are stellar right now.  They are so stellar in fact, that I have decided to go out on a limb and order this. . .

. . . without trying it on first.  (Yeah, I know.  If the abs are that great then why am I not going out on a limb and getting a bikini?  I'll tell you why.  Bronchitis may tighten and tone, but bronchitis wants nothing to do with helping on the stretch mark front.) See that little one inch span of stomach there?  I can handle that, and if I'm having a bad day I'll wrap my obi (karate belt) around my waist and say I'm wearing my summer gi. 

I don't know what it is about the Victoria Secret swimsuit catalog, but it brings out the gambler in me.  I know that I can walk in any department store and try on 40 swim suits without finding one that I like.  Yet, I am completely confident that even without appropriate sizing information, I am going to order this one and be happy.  Maybe it's the lack of dressing room lighting and the comfort of home; but tonight's the night.  I am ordering that swimsuit. 

Plus, I figure once I hack up these lungs I'll have a bunch more room in there and maybe things will flatten out even further.  See, there's a silver lining to even the darkest of clouds. 

Bronchitis = flat abs.  Who knew?  Now if I could just figure out a way to get that nasty cough to work on my thighs. . . hmm. . .

And for all my karate readers, I'll have something to say about karate again, just as soon as I can get my sick butt back to class.  Since I'm sick and you're all feeling appropriately bad for me, scroll down the previous post, vote for me, and email Barbara.  Pretty please???